What's on your To-feel list?May 29th, 2016
No, this isn’t a typo. I don’t mean a To-do, I’m curious about your To-feel list, because how you feel matters as much as what you do.
What if you knew you were born perfect? What if you carried everything you need inside? What if you were always loved no matter what you do?
How would it change the way you feel right now?
As a big fan of to-do lists I used to have dozens scattered everywhere. They were on my desk, in the car, in my bags and wallet, in my phone and computers, on the fridge; moreover, they had a special affinity to pile up on my bedside table ;)
Until I discovered a tool that makes (most of) them redundant – a To-feel list. You can create one too by answering three simple questions:
- How do I want to feel?
- How does it (the joy, peace, inspiration etc.) feel in my body?
- How can I apply my time and energy today to generate the desired feeling?
What if my energy is low and I’m far away from my To-feel list?
I like to widen my focus to find something which is closer to how I intend to feel; that can help me shift my energy. As energy raises, my actions are more inspired and take less effort. I try to move my energy higher before taking any major action or decision. Have you noticed how anything we do or choose while we are low energy carries the same low imprint..? And is there anything we can do about it?
I visualize happy moments when my energy was high, get into how it felt and focus on what I wish – that gets my energy going up. Below are some examples of what tends to work best for me:
I may recall the sensation of surfing, flying in lucid dreams, running in deep forest right after a rain… I can tune in by dancing and singing to an energizing rhythm (ever used a power song?). I savor tasty food, enjoy the perfect beauty of nature, dive into engaging books or join creativity flow. I express love and gratitude, connect with people, have fun or find joy in sharing inspiration and talking about our happy moments.
Every minute I can adjust my own vibration to get back on track and spiral the energy flow up. It does so naturally. Well, if I don’t stand in the way and let it flow, of course. You can be playful about it. Trust your gut to show you a step leading to a feeling you desire.
The beauty of a To-feel list? If we explore how we wish to feel and access the space between our breaths, our thoughts and our actions, we start hearing our heart whispering all the choices we have in the present… For example, as much as I’d love for you to keep on reading, you may choose to stop right now and stretch your body, work on your important project, make a cup of tea or call a friend you keep thinking of but haven’t found the time for.
Our soul knows we are a living story designed to leave a legacy, and therefore it forever holds a spark of hope. By listening and evoking a desired feeling we can cultivate the fire within, that driving force behind our actions and the best generator of excitement in life. It is from this state that we do our greatest work and create anything of profound value.
Have you ever wondered
Why do some people struggle to live a happy life while others seem to “have it all”, live their dreams and for most part don’t show signs of too much stress or effort?
When I was struggling, I used to think that the harder I worked, the more successful I’d be. Although focus is definitely important, too much effort might actually turn counterproductive.
I spent over twenty years in front of one screen or another. I bragged about working hard and getting little sleep. I pushed myself to exhaustion by working long overtime hours. I strained my body with liters of green tea and countless chocolate bars to keep me going… just curious, what are your favorites?
My actions were often driven by ego and fear rather than my heart… And I wasn’t alone. In fact, nearly everyone around me lived like that.
If it wasn’t for a near burn-out state and that nagging feeling that something was fundamentally missing in my life I’d probably never stop. At times it takes an illness or accident to see things clearly. Sometimes the pain of keeping the status quo just needs to get bigger than the discomfort of changing…And it’s only in retrospect that we view that difficult moment as a doorway that had helped us uncover our full potential.
That week I spent by the ocean back in 2013 which started my own 100 days has transformed my life. After a long time I could hear what my heart whispered to me and I connected to that tiny spark of fire that was glowing inside me. As my energy went up I was able to see how coaching is part of my purpose. Although I only had a very vague understanding of what might follow, I set up a website, learned WordPressand started blogging about my journey. As I was spending more time coaching, I slowly started “catching waves” and surfing my life. I had no idea where it might take me but each step along the way felt highly energizing and deeply meaningful. By caring how I feel and following that purpose I became way happier, healthier and more creative. And I’d love to support You in feeling good doing what matters to you as well.
Life’s been flowing and I keep learning how to apply the surfer’s mindset to new challenges as they arise. During the past years I’ve spent about six hundred hours coaching people who approached me because they struggled to find a meaning in life, craft their personal vision, wished to connect to their life’s purpose, create their career sweet spot or just wanted to grow confidence to be themselves seeking the courage to follow their own heart… Most of them had no idea that I’ve gone through those themes myself – each story they shared was different than mine, because we all have our own path paved with individual lessons to create a unique way of “surfing life”.
Take a moment to check in with yourself now.
Do you sense deep down in your gut that I might help you too?
I believe we all came here for a reason. And, we always have the freedom to focus our energy and choose how we live our life today, tomorrow and all the days that will follow. No matter how big or small, we are all meant to leave our footprint in this world.
What are You going to do with the rest of your life?
There is a lot of information available on the internet but going through an in-depth transformation together with a group of like-minded people is a different experience – it helps us find our blind spots, step out to our edge, and reach brand new insights. Even our hardest challenge often turns into a funny story that we enjoy sharing among those we trust. And keeping it meaningful, light and fun is the essence of Surf Life!
So if youd like to join me for that process and some mmmm…mango smoothies
My last question today is this:
In 6 months, are you going to be saying - Someday I'd really like to take the time for myself, learn how to raise my energy, meet amazing people who help me follow my purpose and start “surfing my life…?
Or, in 6 months are you going to say I just had one of the best experiences of my life. I feel like I’m surfing my life!”
I’ve facilitated a 100 days long group coaching program last year so before I forget here is some feedback from participants of 100 days of flow:
I gained a better clarity on what’s really important for me and how to help others see it without judgment. I learned how to detach and guide instead of pushing.I realized more vividly that the journey is what matters and that every day counts, and at the same time we are better off by having a goal as a guide to find our own journey. The value of sharing my journey with others makes me more vulnerable and helped me engage my emotions. At the end of the day it will always be a commitment with myself. ~ Vidal
Thanks to meeting with peer-participants I set up on “my own path” which was by no means easy, but deeply liberating. ~ Katerina
100 day of flow gave me a completely new life. I couldn’t have imagined where we might have gotten in those 100 days. As I am sitting here reflecting the 100 days back, I believed we might succeed, I’d found myself a dream job and unleashed my authentic self, but I had no idea what it might bring into my everyday reality. That I will have to face much greater nightmares than I ever dreamed of… And you know what? It’s amazing. It flows without me striving. And it’s addressing my greatest fear – The biggest fear of a man is to shine Thanks to 100 days of flow I learned everything is ok, and I accept the visibility I used to avoid at all cost. I simply believe in my ability to handle whatever arises. It doesn’t need to be all perfectly planned. It’s not about a perfect outcome or how others see me, it’s not my image or the role I perform. It’s about what I can give and share with people, the change I can bring which may last long after I’m gone.The value I received from you, is a profound support and trust, you believed together with me, guided me through difficulties and I could feel your presence which encouraged my own strength to face challenges and keep on going.A new 100 days are starting for me now. I intend to continue what we initiated, this great gift from you can’t be just filed and labeled “Done”.Jana, thank you a hundred for this awesome program. I wish you all the best with future programs; I know that whatever you create will be full of flow and therefore absolutely unique. ~ Silvia
Now I am taking the program to the next level by kicking the 100 days off with an intense face to face retreat on magical island of Lanzarote!
Never before did we have a chance to spend Surf Life week together.
And never after you’ll be as young as you are right at this moment..!
If Surf Life feels like the experience you are ready for and if the idea of spending a week together and then getting coaching and peer support in the following three months excites you as much as it does me, please listen to that call and let me know what’s on your mind. We’ll talk and figure out whether Surf Life might be the right thing at the right time for You.
I look forward to catching some waves together!
Surfing life’s flow,
P.S. And if Surf Life doesn’t sound like the right thing for you right now that’s completely fine. Maybe you know someone (a colleague or friend) – who’s struggling to surf life and share their best with the world, please invite them to join!